"For the Lord has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-discipline."
2 Timothy 1:7
We were very excited last night, thinking we were going to get to run in the rain, but no such luck. It rained for maybe half of a lap and that was all! But, a tropical storm by the name of Andrea is headed this direction. I am officially registered for a 5k this weekend and although I think it would be hard to run in serious rain, I also think it could be quite fun! How many people can say they ran their first race in a tropical storm? :)
Yesterday was somewhat of a traumatic day for my son and I. My four year old suffers from food allergies and for the first time in his life, I had to take him to the emergency room because of a peanut reaction. I think I was in a state of shock for most of the day, but by bed time I was a nervous wreck. I was consumed by fear and guilt. For as long as I've known about his allergies, I've taken every precaution to protect him. My son knows about his allergies and is so good at being careful, even at such a young age. But, all it took was one small change in our normal routine to show, yet again, how serious his allergies can be.
We spent our morning at the splash pad and, like I usually do for trips to the water or beach, I packed he and I both sandwiches. Because of the heat, I pack us peanut butter sandwiches. My sandwich is always in a separate, air-tight container and with the crust. Jack's sandwich is made from soy butter and is always cut into the shapes of animals and placed inside a sandwich shaped container. Running behind yesterday, I didn't cut his sandwich into animal shapes.
As we sat at the picnic table eating, I looked to my right and noticed an extra bite out of my sandwich. Before my son even had the chance to swallow, I got it out of his mouth. But just a few seconds later, he grabbed his throat and started to cry and I realized my worst nightmare: I didn't have the epi-pen. I handed my daughter to a friend, got Jack in the car as fast as I could, and drove him to the emergency room. He was able to talk to me the entire way, which assured me that though his throat was hurting, it was not swelling shut. His cheeks were puffy and he continued to cry, but thank the Lord, he could breathe!
The people at the ER were quick to get us back and make sure his throat wasn't closing. Not long after we arrived, my son threw up what little peanut butter he had swallowed and was given Benadryl and a steroid. His cheeks went back to normal and he assured me that his throat was feeling better. After 30 minutes of observation, we were allowed to go home. But I left the hospital with a heavy heart.
How could I not cut his sandwich like I always do? I'm the most careful and cautious person in the world when it comes to his allergies, and with one small mistake, we ended up at the hospital. I refused to let him out of my sight all afternoon, even as he slept on the couch. I felt so guilty for the fear he'd experienced and I was still full of anxiety myself. I would still be in that state of mind today if the Lord hadn't quickly reminded me of 2 Timothy 1:7.
"For the Lord has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-discipline."
The Lord does not want me to live in fear, even when it comes to my son's food allergies. The Lord was there with us every step of the way yesterday. He nudged me to turn around at the right moment and notice that bite in my sandwich. He gave me the strength and power to react quickly and get it out of my son's mouth. He protected my son and kept him from having a worse reaction, and most of all, He allowed this to happen when we were just two minutes from an emergency room. Instead of burdening myself with fear and guilt, I need to thank the Lord for the hedge of protection He placed around my son yesterday. I need to thank the Lord for pressing upon my heart the importance of being prepared and knowing what to do in this type of situation.
I just really want to thank You Lord.
"God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble."
Psalm 46:1
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