NO Judgment

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the LORD will be greatly praised."

Proverbs 31:30

While perusing Facebook this evening, I read an interesting blog post. The title was "Why Christian Girls Post Seductive Selfies."

It really got me thinking. 

Where was this post when I was in high school?

College?

But even if it had been around, would I have read it?

Listened?

Heeded it's advice?

Probably not. 

I was that girl.

Almost desperate for attention from the opposite sex, it reflected in the way I dressed and often in the way I acted.

"Selfies" weren't what we called them, but I definitely knew how to take the "right" picture.

I hear a lot these days that parents should control and monitor how their daughters dress/act/etc.

And that's true, to an extent.

Christian parents are judged and berated by other Christians for not "having a handle on their kids."

Well let me tell you, I have wonderful parents who were quick to let me know when I was wearing something inappropriate.

(I STAYED grounded in high school!)

But like any teenage girl, there were times, a lot of times, when I just didn't care and just didn't listen.

It wasn't until I developed my own deep relationship with Christ that I was convicted enough to care.

I made a profession of faith as a preteen, but it wasn't until I was in my 20's that I truly understood what it meant to have an actual relationship with Christ.

As I sit and reflect on this, I think I see what we're missing with our girls.

It's more than just telling our girls that dressing and acting a certain way for attention is wrong. 

Let's be honest. They already know that.

I knew that.

It wasn't until I understood God's love for me that I finally saw that I'd been looking for attention in all the wrong places.

And that's where we have to start. 

We need to teach our girls about God's love first.

Not by telling them to read their Bibles, say their prayers, and follow a list of rules. 

We need to read our Bibles with them, disciple them, pray with them, listen to them without judgment, and show them God's love through us.

Will this always work?

No, it won't.

No parent can force a child to do anything that child really doesn't want to do. 

But let me tell you a little secret.

It's not just the parents job to show our girls God's love.

It's every Christian's job, especially the women.

Don't just spew criticism and judgment toward our teenage girls and their parents.

Love them.

Love changes everything.

And that's what our girls are seeking in the first place.

LOVE.